“The mind is its own place. Hell. Heaven.”
In all my writing circles there’s never been a scarcity of answers on how to achieve the elusive state of happiness. To be exact, I’ve stumbled upon two schools of thought. There are those who believe that a person cannot be happy all-of-the-time and those with whom I associate who believe that one can be happy all-of-the-time. Of which side are you?
Are you happy? If you cannot answer ‘yes’ to such a question, would you mind telling me why you feel that way?
Are you perhaps one who thinks that happiness is yet to come to you? Say, after you achieve such and such a thing?
Or perhaps you feel that you are not deserving of happiness? That everyone gets a quota on happiness, and since you already experienced some once, you’ve already met yours. I kid you not; this one is very popular in the first group I mentioned above.
Or perhaps you feel you need to give up something — which you’re not ready to give up yet — to get you there?
Or, and this is the saddest, perhaps you’re clinging on to old beliefs, sabotaging you from getting you to that happy place?
See, here’s the thing, you are deserving of happiness and you can experience happiness all the time as happiness is a state of mind of your choosing. It’s essential, and a worthy pursuit.
Today, I’ll attempt to point you on the road to happiness-101. I’ll economize on words and use those of someone whose words carry more weight.
Meet transformational expert, Marci Shimoff, co-author of Chicken Soup for the Woman’s Soul and a featured teacher in The Secret. A few years ago she wrote the book, Happy for No Reason, in which she mentioned an incident that almost blew my mind.
She wrote about being blessed to hear a revered sage speak once and about how that time the good sage took a question from a particularly well-dressed man in the audience.
“The man was dressed in an expensive suit, wearing classy shoes, and dripping with gold jewelry,” Marci wrote.
Well, shucks, I thought jumping ahead of myself, that well-dressed brother has a right to ask anything he wants to ask, Marci dear. And the fact that he’s so well dressed is no indication of what he carries inside. Or is it? Oh, I don’t know. I don’t focus on outside appearances. I like to believe that everyone, rich or poor, has a good shot at happiness.
Oh sorry. But that’s how my mind behaves when I read.
The question the well-dressed man asked the sage was this, “What do I need to give up to experience true happiness and inner peace?”
The sage replied, “There’s good news and there’s bad news. The good news is that you don’t have to give up any of your stuff. Poverty isn’t the way to happiness.” I imagine the sage looking directly into the rich man’s face before adding, “The bad news is that you have to do something that may be even harder for you. You have to give up the way you think.”
Profound!
Imagine hearing someone tell you something like that. Would you nod in acknowledgment? Would you stay to inquire how one is to go about giving up the way one thinks? Or would you feel offended by such blatant advice?
How do we let go?
- How does one attempt to change the way one thinks?
- And If there was someone who said they could help, would you believe that they could show you ways how to allow your mind to support your quest for happiness?
Author Marci Shimoff has studied the particulars of a mindset that supports happiness. I respect this woman, I’d listen to her.
Let me direct you to three easy steps, mentioned in chapter 4 of Ms. Shimoff’s book. These serve as the best foundation I’ve encountered.
Marci’s true and tested cheat sheet for creating the shift:
- Question your thoughts
- Go beyond the mind and let go
- Incline your mind toward joy
Do-able, right? I think so. She says, and I quote:
“Our minds — made up of our thoughts, beliefs, and self-talk — are always ‘ON’
“According to scientists, we have about 60,000 thoughts a day. That’s one thought per second.
“Of these 60, 000 thoughts, 95% are the same thoughts you had yesterday, and the day before, and the day before that.
“For the average person, 80% of these habitual thoughts are negative.”
Marci Shimoff, author of 7 Steps to Being Happy from the Inside Out
The YouTube video embedded at the top of this article is beautiful. If you’ve heard the parable before, you already have your answer. But if you haven’t and feel you need more to grasp the core of this short article, I invite you to click on the video. It explains what Marci suggests.
Or copy/paste this link into your browser:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHXwPFMvaXk
To conclude, rich, poor, or in between, you are deserving of happiness.
It’s your divine right to obtain it; an essential and worthy pursuit.
I hope this has provided some insight into how to allow your mind to support the happiness that many times we fail to achieve due to the many negative thoughts that sabotage happiness.
Oftentimes, all you need to give up is your old way of thinking.
“The mind is its own place, and in itself
— John Milton, English Poet.
can make a heaven of Hell, and a hell of Heaven.”
Ornamental art: Image by kmicican from Pixabay
YouTube Video: above
THANK YOU FOR READING
I Wish You Miracles
((I was away from my desk all day and for that reason scheduled this post to fly to you. But upon returning home I heard the news of the Russian invasion and felt it better to refrain from sending it out. Not appropriate, I reasoned.
Just now, wee hours of the morning, I awoke from sleep and have decided I want the post to go live. Someone needs to hear this today of all days.))
God bless us, everyone.
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I am so grateful to read this today. I had come across the wolves story before, but not with that ending.
The duality of everything always known to me. The Buddha or the badass comes to mind.
The balancing of our inner energies and the thoughts we give focus too.
No right. No wrong. Just is.
A sign to reflect within. To find the meaning for us.
Wisher of miracles. Your words ever so powerful.
Thanks for being you.
Hey, Amy. Same with me concerning the ending of that parable. I’d always heard it end at “The one you feed.” And it was enlightening with those ending words.
But this new revelation is whole. It’s badass! Indeed, indeedie!! *wink*
Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts. IWYM ❣️
Today I asked myself if I am or have been happy.. and i am more convinced than ever that there is no complete state of happiness.. ever .. just as sadness, Happiness comes in little pieces, random moments in time that are meant to be savored with “gusto”. Little waves that transform into other emotions that do return from time to time… and this realization can only be achieved with the passage of time.. at it’s own pace.. in it’s own way.. and when the soul is still and at peace..
Hello Suzette. Peace be with you always, my friend. And may happiness be more of a permanent member in your home as opposed to it being a weekend guest. All our emotions are important. And two can be present at the same time. We need to savor them, that’s for sure. I really appreciate you sharing so much with me in so few words. And what beautiful words you shared. I can tell that you have a beautiful heart and just as beautiful a soul. Thanks. Be safe and happy. I wish you Miracles.
Look I like the idea you’re presenting and its very worth, but I don’t really care if I’m happy, it doesn’t particularly bother me either way. I enjoy doing some things, but if I’m happy or not is really immaterial to me.
You’re all set then. No need to burden yourself worrying about this. I am so glad to hear so keep doing what you doing. Blessings, my sweet. xoxo
I so happy to read your story. Very interesting story write up you. I like. I think how & when I always feel happier.✍️✍️you wrote.
Yay! Pleases me enormously you found this to your enjoyment, my dear Raj. Stay as you are. I bless you.
Thank you so much,Selma, 🌷✍️ you so sweet & kind reply . Iam so …so .. dear glad & enjoy me. Really, believe me.👍
😘 👏 🌹 👏
🌷👍
Happiness—a very difficult state of being to define.
I prefer to use the words contented, or peaceful. Thank you for this post.
Contented and peaceful are good too. Stay as you are. I bless you. xoxo
beautiful post Selma.. love the video so awesome.. feeding both and choosing how to show up is so important. today i sit in grief for our world but I hold love and joy as I move through my day writing poems for peace of mind. hugs and love 💖💖
more poems for peace; yes, please. xoxo
I have mixed feelings about the different ending of the wolf story. Anger does have its strength, but I still want to feed the “good” wolf a little more. Thank you for the highlights from Happy for No Reason. I’ve been curious about this book. I will incline my mind toward joy.
Im of the mind that if one inclines one’s mind towards joy, that will take care of the rest. And about the rest of your comment, yup, all our emotions have a purpose. It’s a balancing act. Happy you read. Blessings to you as from every corner of the globe, we intercede for our brothers and sisters in Ukraine. Stay sweet.
Hi, Selma. A wonderful post. Loved the video. Now to something completely different or maybe not!
Sorry I have not been in contact over the last few days. I have been really busy with other distractions. Only now am I beginning to catch up on Emojiku issues and comments. Truly there is no need to worry about reciprocation. It is just wonderful that you have joined in the fun. However, if you wish, you could share and pass on the writing challenge to blogging friends: set your own emojiku prompts: or, just reblog my original post. Here are my responses to your Emojiku. Hope you enjoy –
🤳 Ka-click goes my phone
😎 Delightful winsome coquette
👏 Just what a twitter likes
🤳 Ping ping ping message
😎 Secret flirtations disguised
👏Social media scam
🤳 Selfie for the gang
😎 Proof that I’m so very cool
👏 Praise praise & more
🤳 Don’t forget to smile
😎 Hanging out with hippy trippie types
👏 Sixties back in vogue
I will post today. Watch out for the first one. The second will come later.
Have a wonderful weekend my friend
😜 so cool, you. Ping ping ping 📱 nice. Heading to 😴 for now. GN. xo
Thanks, Selma, Happy Emojiku Dreams My Friend. GN 🛌😴💤
Thanks for the lovely engagement here, Goff. Warms my heart. And you do need to forgive my tardy response: couldn’t have gotten here any sooner. I do appreciate you. I’ll join as often as I’m able. Love the form. xoxo
Pleasure. Great write and read Selma. Happy Writing Poetry Day.
Happiness is so unique person to person, but I think we forget that and try too hard to fit in with the mainstream depictions of happiness. So loved reading this today and being reminded of the connections that bring happiness. 🙂
So true you are, Jaya. We tend to want to imitate with the Joneses and Smiths. There’s where we fall short. Wouldn’t we come to live more ‘in joy’ if instead of putting value on getting more (material wealth) we ascribed value to what we already have based on the enJOYment they give us? That’s how to measure abundance. No?
There’s where the whole article pivots: incline your mind towards JOY. That’s all we need to do, methinks.
Forgive my delayed response. I am a slow poke. Forgive. But I value each and every comment. Thanks so much for reading and commenting, dear friend. Stay sweet. I wish you happiness and an abundance of miracles.