5/7/5 bout of commotion curiosity enchant koi in shallow stream * grabbed my attention rose, flitted to scrutinize koi in shallow stream | | 3/5/3 commotion perks me up at once koi struggles * one false note I scoot to explore fat one's stuck | | 2/3/2 fat koi punctuates spring song * a sigh dart to probe fat koi *** © 2021 selmamartin.com
Senryu are untitled. They’re written in the present tense — about love, human foibles, or personal event; they should be blunt (never sentimental) and have irony or humor.
These serve two purposes today: Day 3 of NaPoWriMo (as I wait for the reveal of the prompt of the day; perhaps I’ll tackle that tomorrow) and practice for TankaTuesday Poetry Challenge at Colleen Chesebro’s WordCraftPoetry.
“Senryu in English focus on the awkward moments in life making the human, not the world around them, the subject.”~ Colleen Chesebro, Prose Metrist, Novelist, & Word Witch
https://colleenchesebro.com/
I, the human who sat by a gently susurrating stream to read, rose, flitted close to investigate the commotion. What I saw was charming– a happy carp got stuck on a rise that made the water-flow shallow in that one spot. The others in the school rounded the rise; followed the water smooth as ever, but this chubby one disregarded the others and thus got himself stuck. Haha. He was probably busy on his phone, not to notice what everyone else was doing. The joke was on him, but his foible gifted this human a pleasant moment in nature.
I wonder if somehow the subject in this string of senryu poems still points to me. Maybe? I’ll keep trying.
Thanks for being here, reading my words. I’ll be sure to drop by yours as well. Happy writing, everyone. I wish you miracles.
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Koi are fun to watch. Hope the one that was stuck got free.
Free is where imagination can lead us… what gets on a page doesn’t always have to make sense.
Just that one has the joy and fun of expression.
There are smaller short forms to play with. The ones I know are; (line/ syllable)
tau ku 1/6, 2/2, 3,8
pi ku 1,3,2/1, 3/4
It’s been fun working on these syllabic forms. I’m wowed by it all.
And there’s more? The ones you mentioned —I’m not familiar with them. More good fun! Thanks for connecting with me. I appreciate you. I wish you miracles.
The variety can be overwhelming. I enjoy short forms and free verse 😀
Write what makes you happy!
Well done, Selma. The main thing to remember about haiku is that it is always about nature. Senryu, are about the human, as you illustrate in your poems. Go back and read the portion about combining lines one and two, and then lines two and three. There should be two separate ideas that somehow combine—that’s the juxtaposition. These take practice and we all learn this stuff together. <3
Thank you so much for giving me of your time. For These I did do the lines 1&2 2&3 genius-thing I learned from you but obviously I haven’t ‘learned’ it yet; I hope to learn that to the point of it becoming a motor-skill. I’ll keep at it.
This is all so beautiful. I never knew. Thanks. Be well, Colleen. Bed time for me. Happy Spring. I wish you miracles.
Glad to help, Selma. We all learn this stuff together. <3